He Didn’t have To Be

30 Jul

Yes im referring to the Country song “He Didn’t Have To Be’ by Brad Paisley.

Tonight my Step-father is in the hospital. It may be serious, it may not be. He has a Defibrillator in his chest. it has gone off three times in the past few days. So the doctors are working to find out why and whats going on. He is over weight at 500lbs. so yes he has health problems. I am worried, sadden that he is in there. It sucks that he spends all day there practically alone while the world goes on. All Alone. Makes me tear up just thinking about it. That is why I stayed with him last night so that he would know that he is not alone and that he wont be all by himself through this. So here’s a little back story on why my step-father is so important to me even though he hasn’t been married to my mother since i was 8 years old….

My mother never married my Biological father. By the time I was born she was back with her High School sweetheart, My step-father. After I was born they got married and when I was 3 my little brother was born. My mother did not try to hide who my real father was. she made sure I saw him every other weekend. I was pretty lucky, I had two dads to spoil me. Unknown to me, my father was fighting my mother for custody. He felt like he could give me a better life. he had more money, had nicer things, and the schools I would go to were top in California. Eventually, when I was eight he finally won custody. so I moved from San Jose to Union City, CA.

So now my mom was single and lost both of her children to their fathers. However, my Step-father felt that I should still see my brother. so every other weekend he came and would pick me up. we would always go to the Drive-In movie theater. It was a blast. Best times of my life. He did everything for us boys. Even though he didn’t have to have anything to do with me. I wasnt his kid. He just went through a divorce and had to raise his own son by himself. But he never failed when I had fallen flat on my face and needed help he was always there. maybe not financially but emotionally.

In 2006 my life changed forever. I lost my job. Worst yet i found one and lost it 30 days later. I had nowhere to go and I couldn’t pay any of my bills. my Step-father offered me to move from California all the way out to North Carolina and I could stay with him. So I made the move. Like I said he has just always been there for me and now I wish I could be there for him. But I am helpless in this situation and cannot save him. there’s nothing physically that I can do to make him magically better. I wish there was. I wish I believed in a God so that I could at least beg for him to be better. I know he’s not dying right now or anything. but his weight worries me. but habits are so hard to break. eating habits are worse than drug habits. Well ill be there for him. as much as I can.

This is my cheap therapy. Since I cant just bang on my drums in my new town house. Well I hope you all go out and give your parents a hug. I couldn’t tell you my last interaction with my mom. I don’t remember it.

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Posted by on July 30, 2012 in Uncategorized


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